but I know I did the right thing. I had to do it for me and my family. I had to call my son and tell him that he could not come to the family Christmas celebration tonight. When Amy and her family were in town the early part of December, and he came out, he was so messed up that Amy was afraid for him to hold the girls for fear he might drop one accidentally. Beth didn't want Abby around him and frankly I didn't want to be around him. I had to make the single most difficult decision in my life, to call my only son and tell him that he would not be able to come.
I have never been apart from him on Christmas before. But then, I never had spend Thanksgiving away from him and I did this year. That was because he didn't call us until 1:45pm the afternoon of Thanksgiving though.
I told Ryan that I was afraid that he would come to the house and pop a bunch of pills and that I didn't want his sister around it and I damned sure didn't want Abby around it.
But why do I feel so badly? It was his choice to take pills last time and it is his choice to continue to take them. I had to do what I had to do for my family.
Please pray for my baby.